Monday, July 30, 2012

Most of All, I Am Happy

August 4th will be the five month mark since I lost my husband. Five months since the hardest day of my life. In the darkest of days, I had to say goodbye to the man who had stood by my side for the past six years. The man who took care of me and loved me with all my flaws.

Rarely does anyone ask me how I'm doing anymore. I think of that as a good sign. That I look as if I'm doing well. Because I am. I have faced things these past five months that have shaped me into a person that is very different from the person I was a year ago. 
I am strong. 
I am brave. 
I am independent. 
I stand up for myself. 
And most of all, I am happy.


Rod will forever be a part of me, a part of my heart. I will never forget him or "get over" the tragic way our relationship ended, but I have moved on. I have started creating a life that I live for just me. A life that continues to make me happy every day. 

Although my heart is fragile, I am putting myself out there again. Dating. Being hopeful about the good things that are yet to come. Looking forward to the next chapter of my life, and being thankful for my past.

Until next time~

Friday, July 27, 2012

High Five for Friday

Finally it's Friday. This week has seemed to last forever. The slowest week in a really long time. I'm going to blame it on a few things. One - there is construction going on across the street from me since they're building new townhomes and it's slowly driving me insane. The joys of working from home I guess; I can't escape it! Two - I haven't been sleeping. All I want is a solid night's sleep and I just lay wide awake thinking too much.

Today, as with every Friday, I'm linking up with Lauren and many other great bloggers for High Five for Friday. Let's see if I did or found anything fun this super long week ...


One:
Today was weigh-in day and I lost another two pounds!! I've still been doing my Isagenix shakes twice a day and doing a daily cleanse in the mornings. It seems to be working still! I now have only seven pounds to lose before I hit my original goal weight. Yesterday I had to go shopping at Victoria's Secret because I'm losing weight everywhere and I also picked up a cute tank from their Pink line and I had to get a size small!

Two: 
Sunday was the finale of The Bachelorette. I loved it so much! I started watching really late into the season, but instantly fell in love with Emily. She comes across as such a sweet person, and is incredibly beautiful. I thought the last two guys were great, but I'm glad she picked Jef. Their connection seemed real and he said the most amazing things. My favorite line of his is still: "I feel like we'll have a love that will make the storybooks jealous." Someday I will find someone amazing as that.

Three:
Tuesday was National Tequila Day. This was definitely a holiday I couldn't pass up so Amber and I headed to Acapulco for margaritas. Great times!

Four:
I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of this in the mail. A reminder to still believe in love and not give up.

From Nordstrom

Five:
Thanks to the lack of sleep, I've been rather introspective about my life this week. Reflecting on the choices I'm making, the situation that I'm in and what I want out of life. This means that I'm drawn to the "Quotes" section on Pinterest and annoyingly post them on Facebook. Here are some of my recent favorites ...





That's it for the week. Hopefully this weekend I can relax, stop thinking so much and get some much needed sleep!

Until next time~

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

30 Day Blog Challenge Fail: The End

I've decided I don't like the 30 Day Blog Challenge. It bores me. Who wants to write or read a boring blog? Not me! Based on posts that are viewed the most, it seems as if the posts where I'm completely honest and exploring things such as my weight loss "obsession" are more popular anyway. I've kind of decided that I'll focus more on those type of posts. 

However, this is one challenge that I was really looking forward to, plus you get to learn new things about me!

Write 15 interesting facts about yourself.

1. The loves of my life are two very furry, kind of stinky (sometimes), but never resist a cuddle. I can always count on them sticking by my side and their endless love.  Yes, they're my dogs!

2. I learned how to read when I was 3 years old. My grandma used to have those Fun with Dick and Jane books and I learned how to read off those. I think she helped shape me into the nerd I am as I still love to read!

3. I have three tattoos. I would like to get one more. I know what I want, but I don't know where. Plus, it's been awhile since I had a tattoo and I'm not looking forward to experiencing that pain again!

4. My most treasured item is a Cabbage Patch doll I've had since I was a little girl. My parents got him for me in the height of the Cabbage Patch doll craze for Christmas, and I have taken him everywhere with me. As a kid, he was with me all the time from trips and sleepovers to doctor visits. And now as a grown up, he still sits in my office. He is an African American doll and I called him Jeffrey, although after trying to search for him, I think his real name is Rubin. Don't know why I called him Jeffrey!

5. I used to always say my favorite flower is a daisy. BUT, over the years, I have added to that list and will now say my favorite flowers are daisies, hydrangeas, sunflowers and hot pink carnations. I can't just pick one anymore!

6. I have one nephew, Garrett, who I think is the greatest kid in the world.

7. I have one brother, Travis, who is two years older than I am. I loved growing up with an older brother. Not only because it meant there were hot, older boys around when I was a teenager, but I loved that he protected me from meanies.

8. My parents are my role models. I love how they worked hard on a farm to give my brother and I a great life, and continue to support and love us as adults. 

9. I haven't traveled nearly as much as I want to, and I have many places on my "must visit" list. The best place I've ever been to though was San Francisco.

10. I have a scar on the back of my right leg from having a mole removed. The doctor had to cut a rather large incision in my leg to completely remove it, and then it got infected. When I went to Urgent Care, the lovely non-English speaking doctor didn't seem to care too much that it was splitting. Then, it got infected again and at that point it was too late to do anything other than take care of the infection so I could walk again. Now, I'm left with an ugly scar.

11. I love watching trashy reality TV. After I watch it, I can usually say, "at least my life isn't that bad."

12. I am a complete girly-girl. I love all things pink, I love flowers, sparkles, make up, doing my hair and fashion. Girly-girl to the core.

13. I would say I'm a little high maintenance. ;o)

14. I have been proposed to twice. Although the first one probably doesn't count since he did it the first night he met me!

15. This year I have found out that I am stronger and braver than I ever thought I was. And that makes me proud. 

I hope you enjoyed getting to know 15 things about me. Hopefully some of them were new to you and that you found them interesting!

Until next time~

Monday, July 23, 2012

Why the Weight Loss Obsession?

These past couple of months I've received a few comments from people about why I'm so focused on losing weight. Why I obsess about it when, according to them, I don't have a lot to lose. So, I thought I would explore that a little more and find out why.

It all started with just wanting to be healthier. With Rod passing away, I really looked at my own eating habits and wanted to change them. I didn't want the same fate. It was my initial wake up call.

Then, it started to take a turn. I went from wanting to be healthy and not be on a diet, to working out more and really watching what I ate. Not letting cookies or ice cream enter anywhere in my diet. Obsessing about losing all the weight and hitting my goal. So, how did this start?

In part, it has to do with being single again. One of my ultimate favorite shows is How I Met Your Mother. And when I became single again and started to think that I would enter the dating world at some point, I kept thinking about how Barney constantly says he won't date "fatties." He has used this line in many episodes, and I just started to really notice it when I had to worry about myself on the dating scene again. I realize that most guys (I hope!) aren't that shallow. But, that 25 extra pounds I had was making me feel inadequate. Definitely not ready to enter the dating world and afraid of the judgement I would face by not being thin and pretty.

So, that leads me on to the bigger issue. Why do I, or did I, feel so fat and unattractive? The answer to this question is hard to admit, and I fear the repercussions of admitting it.

Throughout the past six years, I can't remember a time when I was told I was beautiful or sexy. The highest compliment I ever got was "nice". There were many times when I would get all dressed up, do my hair all pretty and walk down the stairs and not receive a single compliment. I tried over and over again until eventually I realized that I would never get anything more. My self-confidence took a nose dive. I started to not care about how I looked because it didn't seem to matter. I gained some weight, I wore sweat pants constantly and would only try to look cute for weddings or something big. I figured if no one thought I was beautiful or sexy, there was no point in trying.

I remember getting ready for a friend's wedding. I bought a beautiful dress that I was so excited to wear. It made me feel beautiful in the store. I got ready, did my make up, put on some sparkly heels and walked downstairs and did a twirl with a big smile on my face. All I got was a "cute" and he went back to watching TV. I almost cried. And that was the very last time I tried to impress.

Maybe you're thinking I shouldn't have let it bothered me so much. Or let my self-confidence ride on what someone else thought of me. But that's what we do, isn't it? Especially when that someone else is your husband, you take what he thinks seriously. And not having that constant reassurance is hurtful. 

It is possible Rod thought I was beautiful and just didn't know how to express it. I realize that now, but during the time, I couldn't see that. I just felt horrible about myself and after he passed away, I realized how low my self-confidence was. So I've been working on rebuilding it. Finding a way to see myself as beautiful. The weight loss was the first step. I'm starting to come out of the obsession phase of it, and starting to view the weight loss as getting healthy again. But, that obsession helped me gain more confidence so I'm okay with it for right now.

I don't know when I'll be able to look into the mirror and say that I'm beautiful. I hope I can soon. Right now I see myself as being pretty sometimes, and I'm starting to like my body again. At least I'm not looking in the mirror and thinking "this is as good as it gets" anymore!

If you take anything from this post, take this: compliment your spouse, friends or loved ones. That reassurance is important. I read this quote yesterday and I love it: "I think everyone should be told they're beautiful until they believe it."


Until next time~

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 3

Happy Monday! I don't typically blog over the weekends, so I'm continuing on with my 30 Day Blog Challenge with day three today. This one is definitely causing me to think. I have many things that can annoy me depending on my mood and the day, but to have to pick out the things that always annoy me is a little bit of a challenge. Maybe... or maybe when I start writing I will find out that this is the easiest post to write!

Day 3: What are your top 5 Pet Peeves?

1. People who always have to one up me or be in competition.
I'm not talking about people sharing similar experiences when you're having an issue or telling a story. I'm talking about saying that you're not feeling well, and someone saying "yeah, well me either and I feel worse." Sometimes it's okay if just I'm the one who is sick or is experiencing an issue. Just give me a hug, say sorry and leave it at that.

2. People who are intentionally rude.
I'm pretty sure I take the whole Minnesota nice thing a little too seriously. I always say "sorry" if someone runs into me like it's my fault and try to please everyone. So when someone is intentionally rude to me, I have issues. 

3. Grammatical errors.
I realize that no one is perfect. We all make mistakes when writing. Me included. Especially if I'm typing on my iPad or iPhone. But there are those errors that drive me crazy. Like saying "I'm board" instead of "I'm bored." Or not using the correct they're, there and their.

4. Using pictures of your baby as your Facebook profile picture.
This one might bring me some haters, but just hear me out! I've had many people who have requested me as a friend and the only picture I can see of them is this chubby cheeked baby. How the heck am I supposed to know who that is? Or worse, if someone has a picture of a baby as their profile then talk about how they spent the whole night drinking and are hungover. Bad message to link with that cute picture of a baby! I'm sure your baby is adorable and perfect, but please stick your head in the shot too so we can make a connection.  

Yes, I realize that if I had a baby I might feel a little differently about this. But I don't, and I wouldn't just use my dogs as my profile picture. Maybe a picture of me & my dog, but not just my dog.

5. Crumbs on the counter.
Over the years, I have noticed that I'm starting to get a little OCD with my house being clean. I hate having a mess. I want everything where it belongs. The worst offense is crumbs left on the counter. Seriously, it's not difficult to take the dish rag and wipe off the counter after you make a sandwich or toast. And don't just wipe the crumbs on the floor!! 

So there you are. The top five things that annoy me. I realize it's pretty easy to think of things that annoy me, especially on a Monday morning!

Until next time~

Friday, July 20, 2012

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 2

Yesterday I started my 30 Day Blog Challenge to keep me writing and help me figure out the focus of the blog moving forward. So, let's move on to day 2 of the challenge!
 
Day 2: Where you'd like to be in 10 years.

Jeesh, I have no clue. I don't even know where I'd like to be in one year much less 10 years! I found this year that plans change too quickly at a moments notice that making a 10 year plan isn't worth it. So, here are some things that I hope I have in 10 years ...

I want to be comfortable and happy in my life.
I want to be debt free and financially stable.
I want to be with a man, married hopefully, who loves me more than anything in the world. A man who chooses me and fights for me every day and never wants to let me go. A man that I love with all my heart.
I want to be living or have lived in a different state. Sorry Mom, but I don't want to live in Minnesota my whole life!
I want to travel and see the world.
I still want to be close to my family and talk to them often.
I want friends around me who make me laugh and lend a shoulder when I need to cry.
I want to be healthy.
I want to be having fun with life.
 But most of all, I just want to be happy, loved and in love. It's what I want now, in one year, five years and in 10 years.

What about you? Do you make a 10 year plan??

Until next time~

High Five for Friday

This week has flown by. Probably because I was on vacation for the first part of the week! Since it's Friday, that means it's time for another link up with Lauren at From My Grey Desk for High Five for Friday.


One:
I took a mini-vacay this past week! I went with my mom and we stayed at Ruttger's Bay Lake Lodge by Brainerd, MN. It was a beautiful resort and we had a great time. I got to relax by the pool for a whole afternoon catching a tan while visiting with my friend Mandi and watching my nephew play in the pool, and I got to spend some much needed bonding time with my mom. It was great!!

Mercedes and me hanging out on the dock by the lake.

My mom and me.

Two:
On Tuesday night, I wrapped up my mini-vacay by meeting up with a friend for dinner at the Texas Roadhouse. I hadn't seen this friend in a very long time and it was so nice to meet up and get caught up. Although I'm not much of a steak eater, the Texas Roadhouse is always a fun place to go. And I better not have to wait six years to see my friend again!

Three:
Wednesday night Amber and I went to the Twins game. This is my second game of the year, and I have loved going to both of them and being at Target Field! Plus, Amber and I have so much fun together and even though the Twins lost (boo!), we made it exciting.

Here I am in my cute new Twins shirt.

Me and Amber.

Four:
At the Twins game I heard the best pick up line that it deserves it's own post. Some guy came up to me while I was holding my phone in my hand and asked "Are you texting me? Because I'm vibrating." How awesome is that line??? I totally think everyone should be using that! ;o)

Five:
This morning I stepped on the scale not expecting to have lost any weight since while on vacation I ate what I wanted rather than sticking to a strict diet, but I lost three pounds since last week!!! I'm so amazed! I love getting closer to my goal weight, and I'm so happy that I'm starting to actually like my body again.

So that's it for this week. I had a great week full of fun and excitement. If you're interested, I also started a 30 Day Blog Challenge yesterday to keep me writing more often and to let my readers get to know a little more about me. Check it out!

Until next time~

Thursday, July 19, 2012

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 1

I feel as if I'm at an impasse right now with this blog. I love writing and expressing my feelings through the blog, but I'm not sure what direction I want the blog to take anymore. I started the blog to share baking adventures because I love to bake, but that changed this year with the passing of my husband. I started to use the blog as an outlet for expressing my grief and dealing with the challenges of moving on. But now, four and a half months later, I'm over the worst and am only looking toward the future. I don't really bake any more so going back to that is not an option. Plus, there are so many baking blogs out there that I just can't compete in all the noise. 

So, while I sort out the direction of the blog - fashion, beauty, dating as a widow, any ideas?? - I'm going to start a 30 Day Blog Challenge. It will be good to challenge myself to write pretty much daily and maybe it will help format the upcoming content. I'm looking forward to this, and I hope you enjoy getting to know me a little bit better!

Here are the details:



Let's get started!
Day 1: Discuss your current relationship.

Well, it's not complicated - I just don't have one. I was married up until the beginning on March and now I'm a widow ... single again. I'm not dating, but I'm ready. I can officially say that. I am ready for a date!! It feels good just to say that!

Now the challenge comes to finding someone to date. How do you meet people now?? I work from home so at work is not an option. The guys at my gym are either way older or younger, or married. I guess I could let people set me up or try Internet dating. Scary!!

I think I'm going to be a very picky dater. I have a list. Wonder if I'll find someone who makes all the checks on that list??


I hope you enjoyed my first challenge post! Come back tomorrow for a new challenge. And if you're interested in joining the challenge, let me know and I can figure out how to add links to the bottom and we can have a link party! Or let me know if you know of one already started and I'll join that one.

Until next time~

Friday, July 13, 2012

High Five for Friday

Finally it is Friday!! 
This week has seemed to last forever. I'm thinking it's because I'm waiting in anticipation to actually take a vacation. Other than when my husband passed, I haven't actually taken a vacation since starting my job quite a few years ago. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't count as a vacation. I wish I were going somewhere super exciting and fun, but I'm still excited to have a mini-vacation.

Friday also means it's time to link up with Lauren and From My Grey Desk for High Five for Friday. Let's find some fun things that happened this week ...


One:
Last Saturday was a great day. I spent the afternoon and evening with Amber just having fun and having a girls day. We went and saw Magic Mike (yes, the male stripper movie!), went shopping where I bought a pretty dress for dinner this coming Sunday night and we went out for drinks that night. I even stayed up way past my bedtime since I didn't get home until after 1am! It was just a good, fun-filled day.


Two:
Remember how excited I was to buy new shorts from American Eagle? Yeah, I had to go and exchange those for a smaller size!!! How exciting! I now fit into a size six from there. Crazy!

Three:
I love all things girly including makeup. Growing up I used to spend all my allowance on makeup. Lately though I realized I've gotten into a rut. I own about 10 different eyeshadows and they're all browns and pinks. Boring!! So, I decided I needed to spice it up a little bit. Try something a little daring. While at Ulta, the salesgirl helped me pick out this super cool Urban Decay eyeshadow palette. I'm looking forward to trying out all the colors and breaking out of my brown rut!

How cute is this packaging??

Four:
This might seem like an odd "high" for the week, but bear with me. This week I donated all of Rod's clothes, shoes and other things. I scheduled for a pick up from the Vietnam Veteran's of America so I just could leave the boxes outside for them to come get. Yes, it was sad to see it all go. But, I feel so much better now that it's out of my garage. I'm not looking at boxes of his stuff every time I go into the garage. It's a big step!

Five:
And saving the best for last, I finally went to the salon and got fresh highlights and a small trim. Jenny Lea, my amazing stylist, decided to take me a little blonder with adding lots of highlights. I love it!! I'm happy that the red from last summer is almost all out of my hair now. And just cutting off a half inch helps my hair look and feel healthier, which is always good since I'm growing it out.


Well, that was my week. It was a good, busy week and I'm happy that it's almost vacation time!!

Until next time~

Thursday, July 12, 2012

The Countdown

In only three days, on July 15th, I will be "celebrating" the day I got married for the first time without my husband. It would have been our sixth wedding anniversary.


I've been asked a couple of times how I think I'm going to handle that day. How I will be feeling.

The truth? I have no idea.

Will I wake up and be okay remembering the perfect, fun filled wedding day? Or will I wake up sad and be depressed throughout the day remembering that I will no longer celebrate this anniversary?

I just cannot fathom how I'm going to feel. But, in preparation of this big day, I've been busy. Planning a mini getaway to get out of town, out of our home, and have some down time to either remember in sadness or celebrate the sweet memories. I even bought a new dress to wear out to dinner that night since on every anniversary, we've gotten dressed up and gone out for dinner. 

They say time heals. With every passing day wounds are healed and happiness starts to take its place. And I believe that. I feel it happening with me. At first, I felt pain and sadness that I never thought possible. That I never would wish on anyone. But now, four months later, I truly am doing okay. I have learned to live on my own. I have opened myself up to this next phase of my life.

But, what happens when a day comes that forces you to remember? Remember that you are no longer married. That the husband you loved with all your being was taken from you. 

Well ... I'll keep you posted on that. 

Until next time~  

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Somedays I Hate Shopping

This past week I had to embark on a dreaded shopping trip (yes, those do exist) ... I had to find a swimsuit. Ewww.

The last bathing suit I bought was probably four years ago and has only been worn about three times. Only once in an extremely public place. I hate wearing a swimsuit!! But, I really needed to get one with my mini vacation and a boat outing coming up soon.

I had a few style ideas in mind. However, after trying on suit after suit, I just couldn't find any that I liked. 
My thighs looked too big. 
It didn't cover my chest enough. 
Seriously, my boobs would pop out of that one. 
Do they still make those bathing suits that go down to almost your knees?? I need one of those. 

No matter what, I couldn't find one that I liked enough to buy. Honestly, I just didn't like my body enough to be able to find one that I liked. So, after trying on about 10 suits on Saturday, I came home empty handed.

Last night I decided to try again. I was feeling a little bit better about myself. I had just gotten my hair done and that always helps with self-confidence. I tried on about 10 suits again at a couple of different stores. I tried as hard I could to not hate on my body while trying on the suits. I kept focusing on the things that I do like about my body now rather than focusing on the things I still don't like. And in the end, that really helped me be able to find a suit. 

And I finally bought one!!

From JCPenney

I'm not saying I'm going to feel incredibly awesome in it. I still wish I had the perfect bikini body. And I'm sure I'll feel incredibly self-conscious the first few times I wear it. But I am proud that I found a suit I liked. I'm happy that going to the gym has helped me find good things about my body; things I'm not embarrassed to show anymore.

Now, I just need to keep the positive self talks going while wearing my swimsuit next to my co-workers in a couple of weeks with their perfectly slim bodies!

Until next time~

Friday, July 6, 2012

High Five for Friday

It's Friday for real today? The whole holiday in the middle of the week sure has thrown me off this week. But if it's the end of the week already, I'll take it! 

Fridays mean a link up party with Lauren over at From My Grey Desk for High Five for Friday. I love looking through my week and finding the highlights of my week ... even if they seem little. It's important to be grateful for those little things too!


One:
My baby girl turned seven on Monday!! She got spoiled throughout the day with lots of treats including a spoonful of peanut butter - her favorite. 

How adorable is she??

Two: 
The 4th of July wasn't super exciting for me. The 4th of any month is still very difficult for me with so many memories of Rod, but I tried to stay upbeat throughout the day. My original plan was to take the dogs to a park and explore, but with temps in the triple digits and humidity, we just stayed home in the air conditioning. I went out with my lovely neighbors for dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings and even indulged in some ice cream. I had a mini Mint Oreo Blizzard - yum!

Three:
Speaking of ice cream, look what I found - Cold Stone coffee creamer!! I've seen the commercials for it, but haven't been able to find it anywhere. While reaching for my normal all natural vanilla creamer, I spotted it at Target so I snatched it up. I tried it today and it's pretty good. But how awesome would cake batter flavor be???


Four:
I've lost 21 pounds since April. Whoo-hoo! I'm slowly starting to gain self-confidence. I really did not like how I looked before and just felt ugly all the time. Working out, eating right and losing weight are helping me get to the point of thinking I look okay; sometimes even {almost} pretty.

Five:
And, thanks to the self-confidence I'm gaining, I went out and bought some new clothes including shorts and a tank since it's so hot. I figured that if I kept wearing clothes that were too big on me, I would constantly feel big and not see my body where it's at now. 

Shorts & tank are from American Eagle.

So, that's it for my week. I hope you all had a good weekend and remember to be thankful for all the good things in your life!

Until next time~

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Isagenix Update

Let's talk about Isagenix again, shall we?

I started Isagenix a month ago. In that time, I have lost 12 pounds and lots of inches. Including four inches around my stomach! I am so very, very happy about those inches lost!!  I have gone from a size 12 (which were starting to get tight!) to a size 6 or 8 (depending on where I'm shopping). I also went from tops in size large or extra large to mediums and even had to buy a small at Kohl's yesterday. I wish, of course, that I would lose weight faster. But I'm still happy that I'm losing.

On a side note, I know someone who is on the 9 day cleanse and lost 11 pounds in just her first few days. Amazing!! And I'm incredibly jealous! If I could lose 11 pounds that quick I would be at my goal weight. Yup. I'm jealous.

Right now I'm doing one cleanse day a week (every Monday), and still replacing two meals a day with a shake during the rest of the week. I am planning on continuing this for at least another month. I have about 15 more pounds I want to lose. And lots of toning to do! I still go to the gym five days a week, and also have started a 15 minute tone routine before I go to bed. I know I can make it to my goal! Sometimes I worry that I'm obsessing about my weight, but I'm hoping it's a healthy obsession!

This week will be interesting. Not only is it a holiday tomorrow (Happy 4th of July!), but my Isagenix order was supposed to ship yesterday and it STILL hasn't shipped. Yes, Isagenix shipping system, I am very upset with you! I don't have enough shake mix to get me through this week so I'm going to have to be super careful what I eat. And get on the phone soon and find out when my order is going to ship!

I thought it might be kind of fun to share some pictures with you to show you my progress. I don't have any photos from this past winter when I was at my highest weight, but here a few from last summer and fall: (And it pains me to share these photos. Especially the one on the right!)

Cute dress, but I felt so wide in it.
I just look icky next to the showgirls.

And here is what I look like now ...

Today - in clothes I just bought from American Eagle.
Cute maxi dress - not looking so wide anymore!

Sometimes I feel as if I look good ... that I look like I'm losing weight. But most of the time, I still see myself as overweight and chubby. So sharing these photos is a huge step for me! I just keep seeing all the negatives about my body, and even though I know the scale is changing, I'm not really comprehending it. Does that make sense??

Wouldn't life just be so much easier if I naturally looked like a Victoria's Secret model???

If you're interested in Isagenix, check out my website! I'm proof it's working!

Until next time~

Monday, July 2, 2012

Monday Musings

Last week I traveled for work and with no internet connection in my hotel room, I missed my High Five for Friday post. So, I thought I would post it today as Monday Musings instead!

(And seriously, how did my co-worker who was just down the hall have wireless internet and not me???)

Today is a very special birthday in my house - Happy Birthday, Mercedes!! I love this puppy so much and will spoil her crazy today! If it weren't 100 degrees out, I would bring her somewhere fun like PetSmart and buy her treats and toys, but I think the car would not be a good place for her today.

First bath the day we brought her home!
Sleepy puppy.

She was such a cute puppy!
And she's still cute today!
Last Friday night I went out with my co-worker and stayed out until after 1 a.m. I can't remember the last time that happened! I had so much fun.

Carrie and me hanging out and having fun!

Do other people have random conversations like this? Yes, Amber and I are weird. Maybe a little mean to some of you. But seriously, the guy sunbathing without his shirt on is well into his 60's and spends his day drinking beer and watching TV. Only guys who look like Ryan Gosling should be running around without a shirt on. And can guys who do look like Ryan Gosling come live around me???


I officially have no clothes to wear. Okay, I have a few things. But all of my jeans, shorts, t-shirts and even sweatpants are falling off me. This is not a bad problem. Except I don't have money for a whole new wardrobe! I did end up picking up a couple of things including a pair of size 6 skinny jeans. Again ... size 6 skinny jeans. Crazy!! Isagenix definitely works!

Lauren Conrad from Kohls. The only line I buy from there!

Wednesday is Independence Day! It's going to hot and humid here I'm sure. Beer might be necessary. And I hope to find something fun to do. Somewhere to wear my cute blue star tank I picked up at Target. How do you celebrate?

Until next time~